Lost in nothingSleeping, dreaming, waiting, wishing,life is lost in loving. Giving, taking, thinking, doing,love is lost in nothing.
I Was RecklessShe thought I was thoughtless,but she could never know,In truth I was reckless,from my destruction I will grow.She thought I was thoughtless only when I found the center in my world that demanded my focus. It hurt to know that no matter how much I loved her, she only loved the part of me that was weak. When I found strength in my conviction, she turned from me, never to return.But she could never know, that my mind was always on her, even when times were hardest on our love for each other. It hurt to know that when I became my strongest, she was her weakest and could not have me. Then she found another, who in weakness provided her an outlet she had lost in me.In truth I was reckless, that night I spent popping pills on the couch. I did not care to end myself, only to sleep thoughtless of her. Too bad the mind is stronger than doctors sometimes, and my mind would not stop. Then the authorities came, and
Cat and MouseYou must think you're something,Preened and proper in your dress,I'll tell you that you know nothing,My thought's you'll never guess.In my mind's eye we were dancing,Our bodies pressed in the rain,The raindrops on our skin, prancing,As we circled in our game.Cat and mouse, you had me,You lured me with your tease,What were you really thinking,As you took me to my knees?
The part truly meThey pushed and they pulled,Yet got nowhere with me,They picked and they proded,And found nothing of me.If they'd only ask,I'm sure they would see,The piece that is left,Is the part truly me.
in time you will forget meIn all the times I told you,I love you, they were true.In all the times I held you,To care and shelter you.I never thought to trap you,Nor tried to hold you down,I only cared to admire you,To erase your depressive frown.I meant only to protect you,From the person I really was,In truth I only deceived you,Breaking your sacred trust.I have always cared for you,Even if it never showed,To me, the closer I pulled you,The more of you I stole.In time you will forget me,And you will start again,In time you will find another,And feel complete again.You were lost inside me,While I was lost in us,Please, I beg, forgive me,So I may return to dust.
The reasonI write this poetry,Everyday, line by line,In hopes that some day,I will find my mind.
Did they find meI see through the darkness,I sense it through the pain,The promise of pain it harkens,The deranged rarely feign.I'm staring at the shadows,They are staring back at me,Alone the darkness beckons,It is hatred that I see.In darkness did they find me,With blood upon my hands,In destruction did they leave me,My blood upon the lands.I die lost in silence,To death do I bleed,Our actions they bind us,To our destiny.
In My HeadThe demon sits and watches,As though we were its prey,Upon its plan it sketches,I feel its mind at play.To know what its thinking,If only I could foresee,Its eyes I see them scheming,Our demise, its only dream.I couldn't stand to tell you,As we were laying there in bed,But I swear I will protect you,From the demon in my head.
A Painful AscendancyYou feel the pain surround you,A sensation you understand,You see the stars astound you,A love held in your hand.You feel the power find you,An expression you adore,You hold the trust inside you,A shock you cannot ignore.You pull on the chains tightly,An attempt to break free,You welcome this joy nightly,A painful ascendancy.